Reagan's List of Firsts

1.First to turn America into a DEBTOR nation in
Peacetime
2. First to increase DEBT faster than growth of
national income in eight years
3. First to increase DEBT faster than growth of gdp
over eight years
4. First to double the deficit in just eight years
5. First to “almost”: triple the national DEBT in just
eight years
6. First to increase SPENDING by 80%--over 8 years.
7. First to SPEND more in eight years than was spent in
prior 50 years.
8. First to have “real” INTEREST RATES of 8% after
averaging 1% over 35 years.
9. First to keep PRIME INTEREST RATES at 20%.
10.First to over value the dollar to the yen at rate of
262 yen to 1 dollar.
11.First to have served as Governor and increase STATE
SPENDING by 112%
12.First to have HOME LOAN INTEREST RATES as high as
16%
13. First to CUT TAXES by 60% for his rich pals
14. First to allow the SAVINGS AND LOAN INDUSTRY to be
raided after signing a deregulatory bill and
proclaiming “I think we have hit the jackpot”. Come and
get it the vaults are unguarded.
15. First to deal with TERRORISTS
16. First to send an AUTOGRAPHED BIBLE to a man he
called “The Satan of Terrorists”.
17. First to have an ADMIRAL plead the Fifth Amendment.
18. First to have a stealing, lying, gutless wife
abusing MARINE LT. COLONEL plead the Fifth Amendment.
19. First to have a “sitting” CABINET MEMBER INDICTED
20. First to have an ASSISTANT SECRETARY OF STATE
INDICTED.
21. First to have an ASSISTANT SECRETARY OF DEFENSE
SENT TO PRISON.
22. First to have over 100 MEMBERS OF AN ADMINISTRATION
CHARGED WITH CRIMES..
23. First to have more members of his administration
charged with crimes than CUMULATIVE TOTAL OF ALL OTHER
PRESIDENTS in the twentieth century
24. First to set a record for the LARGEST ONE DAY
PERCENTAGE DECLINE in the DOW in history. 10-19-87
25. First to have over $10,000,000 INCREASE IN WEALTH
from serving for 8 years as president.
26. First to testify ”under oath” 130 times that ”I
DON’T REMEMBER” .
27. First to have an Admiral with a photographic memory
testify 128 times “ I DON’T REMEMBER”.
28. First to undergo BRAIN SURGERY a few months after
leaving office. No pain no gain.
29. First to, repeatedly, FALSIFY HIS WIFE’S AGE. As
tho anyone cared.
30. First to promote his religious faith and never have
an ACTIVE CHURCH MEMBERSHIP.
31. First to rarely use the term JESUS CHRIST in
speeches.
32. First to seek GUIDANCE FROM THE STARS not from God
33. First to have had a SHOTGUN WEDDING.
34. First to have worked as a lead-on in Las Vegas.
35. First to call a Stealing, Lying, Psychotic, wife
abusing Marine a “LIAR.
36. First to have been OPENLY ALIENATED from his
children.
37. First to have served with ALZHEIMERS
38. First to have UNEMPLOYMENT AT 10.8% since great
depression.
39. First to attack a small unprotected nation with
88,000 inhabitants and 10,000 bb guns then PROCLAIM -
“America stands tall again”— “we have whipped the
Vietnam Syndrome”-we have defeated communism”. Gosh!
What if we had whipped Cyprus?.
40. #1-in FARM FORECLOSURES
41. #1-In BANK FAILURES
42. #1-In SAVINGS AND LOAN FAILURES
43. #1-In Percent increase in PERSONAL BANKRUPTCIES
44. #1-In recorded MISSTATEMENTS
45. #1-In never having a single press conference in
which he did not make at least one or more INCORRECT
STATEMENTS.
46. #1-In needing a staff person standby during press
conferences to tell the press “WHAT HE REALLY MEANT”.
47. #1-In having SERVICEMEN KILLED during peacetime.
48. #1-In largest DROP IN POPULARITY in one week.
49. #1-In being first to HONOR NAZI STORM TROOPERS by
calling them” Innocent Victims”
50. #1-In being first to be labeled “BRAIN DEAD AFFABLE
DUNCE’ by this writer.
51. First to lie-over and over-to reporters “I DO NOT
DYE MY HAIR my barber uses a special shampoo”
52. First to have a wife who ”forced” him to WEAR THREE
SUITS in one day
53. First to boast “Not bad for a DUMB GUY who worked
only 20 hours per week”.
54. First to have his wife sit nearby and WHISPER
ANSWERS to questions
55. First to FALL ASLEEP while the Pope spoke
56. First to invite the Pope to visit the White House
and “BRING THE WIFE AND KIDS”
57. First to have his press secretary remove him from
the microphone because he could not answer questions.
Then, as the reporter
yelled out “answer my question” he replied “MY HANDLERS
WON’T LET ME SPEAK”. Quick get the white coat.
58. First 20th Century president to have historians
RATE HIM BELOW every president of the 20th except for
Richard Nixon. 1994 Poll.
59. First to give us a First Lady with a past
reputation for giving the BEST BJ in Hollywood.
60. First to suggest his eldest son undergo PSYCHIATRIC
examination