Gotta get this off my spirit

[luvtimes]

so I unload it here...

sorry in advance...

my question is this...

if you were married to a man for say 100 years....just for the sake of I don't remember how long...ok

and he loses his job... and pulls out all his life's savings... trying to keep up with status quo... started a business on his own... and it's failing or say not doing so good... typical scenario

now that the money is a month away from 0 balance....tapped out on every account....

he's now taking it out on his wife.... my friend... to the point of hatred comments and threats of leaving and taking whatever he can... where to go when you're broke is.... who knows...

I'm in fear for her safety.... seriously... the last time I got involved in a domestic... people died.... and today it hunts me terribly...

neither can move on in different directions....life insurance policies aren't an issue cause there is none on either side...but the hatred... is overwhelming....or should I say unspeakable...I won't here...this already is too much....

both are clinging because they are all they have....he has tried to isolate me from her but I won't do it... call it friendship... but someone else should know what's going on....just in case... but I do keep my distance... trust that.... I'm just a good listener in this matter....

I pretend that I don't know what is going on but I do....and it's frightening to say the least... how do I know these things... cause she tells me....that's how...

I've tried not to call there but somehow when she can talk, like when he's out on an errand.... she calls me...

me? 

I would have been gone the first time he put his hands on me... prison gone... but that's me...she called the police and he left afterwards... and she never pressed charges... domestic...and the police didn't follow up on it....

but now time has passed and the issues are magnified ......

I'm just saying this to unload....

will there ever be peace in the valley....ever...

[emilyB]

Sounds like your friend needs to see a lawyer and get some good legal advice.  Be careful luv , if your friend's husband has issues of anger and violence, keep a very low profile.  It's a shame when a marriage of that longevity implodes but maybe he's been able to rule the roost and call all the shots, until she finally had enough............a little late!

[sunshine]

Maybe she should be  looking for a woman's shelter and when the time is right...get out. They will protect her from him. So sad.

[luvtimes]

Being left.... is probably the worst of the two evils for her... self reliance is not her strongest quality...especially at her age....her sisters have passed and she now only has her brother if push comes to shove...and her pride would kill her if she had to do that...

the clocks are clicking and it's about to run out....

shelter is an option... I will softly suggest next time I talk to her... when she calls...I'm trying hard to step back out of this mess...  not a busy body by no stretch of the imagination... just a listening ear until she can figure it all out....

what would happen to him... I don't know... cause he is alienated by his whole family and as families go... do I need to speak.... are there men shelters....I can't figure it all out in my mind....

but we know he will go somewhere....and so will she... I'm hoping that they can pull it all together and work as one... someone has got to give or both....it is so sad... so sad...

divorce is an option but in this case no one wins....